I'm traveling through Spain lately. I’ve spent time in Gijón, Madrid, and Seville. One of the things I’m having a bit of trouble adjusting to is how to navigate travel on sidewalks and in museums. I’ve been spending a lot of time in art museums, negotiating my way past people in hallways, galleries, and on sidewalks.
Some of this is definitely culture shock. Some of it is my own cultural ignorance. And, if I’m being honest, some of it is my bad habit of slipping into the role of the long-suffering victim of other people’s behavior. I know, rationally, that it’s not possible that everyone I meet is selfish or unaware. Emotionally, though, my shoulders don’t always get the memo.
After one too many tight squeezes and near-collisions, I decided to ask for help. I used the scholar function on ChatGPT and asked whether there were any studies or coping mechanisms that might help me deal with both the physical navigation and my rising irritation.
What it told me was surprisingly comforting. A lot of the stress comes from expecting cooperation in places that actually run on unspoken rules. People aren’t ignoring me on purpose. They’re following patterns they’ve learned work. Once I stop expecting eye contact to mean anything, and once I move earlier and more clearly, things get easier. Even more helpful was the reminder that my anger isn’t a moral failure. It’s just a nervous system reacting to repeated small frustrations.
So now I’m trying a few small changes. I move a little sooner. I breathe out longer than I breathe in. I remind myself that my job is to get through the space, not to teach a lesson in courtesy. I still get annoyed sometimes. I’m human. But I’m also enjoying the art more, the streets more, and the trip as a whole a bit more gently.
It turns out that adjusting how I walk is easier than adjusting how I think, but both are worth practicing when you’re a guest in someone else’s rhythm.
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